My name is Guru Gonorrhea Gabe deluxe version. I was born a poor black child but slowly evolved into a respectable caucasoid down syndrome farm owner. I am the supreme president shot-caller of Nicaragua. I am the inventor of bite sized explosive pachyderms, steam engines, and the question mark. I enjoy getting high and breeding gold fish. "I'm a joker, I'm a smoker, I'm a midnight toker. I sure don't wanna hurt no one."
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
Thanatos Wave~ Maura Holden
dats meThe based ninja.
(Source: iheartyourname)
“I was born a poor black child” - Steve Martin
A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx, known atheist.
”Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!”
At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decisions made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.
”How old is this rock, pinhead?”
The arrogant professor smirked and smugly replied “4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian.”
”Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real… then it should be an animal now.”
The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.
The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named “Small Government” flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.
The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.
Semper Fi.
p.s. close the borders
p.p.s. That ex-SEAL was EINSTEIN.
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(Source: vvhatserface)
Hey, bruh, stop messing with the earth, bruh. Real talk, we hear about these deadly gases going on in the earth, and I’m like, whodie! For real. I’m like, whodie. Whodie, get that oil out the ocean, whodie -Lil B
Courtesy of DM.
(Source: svdp)
